|GSP lives the most boring life EVER.|
If you're a GSP fan, and you're offended by this, I'm sorry to tell you that your sarcasm meter is busted.
How You Can Always Blame GSP for a Boring Fight:
- If GSP takes a fighter down for GNP, he’s a chicken.
- If GSP takes a fighter down and goes for submissions, he’s a LNP artist.
- If GSP keeps it standing and goes for a lot of power strikes, he’s trying too hard.
- If GSP is landing those strikes at a solid clip, focus on the ones he missed.
- If GSP keeps it standing and goes for accuracy, he’s got no killer instinct.
- In all scenarios, it doesn’t matter if GSP beats a guy up worse than anyone ever has. He’s boring because there’s no finish.
- If a top 10 WW has recently knocked anyone out, and GSP hasn’t fought him, then he’s being ducked and the UFC is protecting GSP.
- Make sure you never mention Cruz or Edgar when calling GSP a boring decision champ. He must only be compared to Silva, during which no reference to the Maia, Leites, or Cote fights shall be made.
- Deny the difficulty of GSP’s opponents by calling them cans, and if that’s not possible, make excuses (grease, gassing, age, fear, etc). Don’t forget to mention that GSP got KO’d by a midget.
- If all else fails, use the following sarcastic remark: “Oh I see, GSP is so good that he can’t finish anybody”
Did I miss anything?